Enough

Enough.  How many times a day do I say this.  Would you like some more coffee?  No thanks, I’ve had enough.  Would you care for seconds?  No thanks. I’m full.  I’ve had enough.  I can honestly say that in my entire life, I have always had “enough”.  Enough food, enough clothing, enough hugs, enough attention, enough of everything.  All of us frankly don’t even think of this in the course of our day.  It’s just understood.  It is, for lack of a better description, our inalienable right. Enough.

That is until we don’t have enough.  If one of those elements went missing…were suddenly absent…well then….THAT would be ALL we could think about.  Our minds would race with how in the world we are going to get that ONE THING.  THAT THING.  THAT ONE THING. THE ONE THING I NEED.  See how obsessive it can become?

I am a mother of nine beautiful kids.  Some are biological, some adopted.  I’ve seen kids who spent their lives with “enough” and I’ve had a bird’s eye view of kids who didn’t. 

If I can be so bold as to take you down the path of “not enough” for a moment.  Perhaps we can peer inside the aching heart.  Feel the pangs of the empty plate.  Understand the lack of physical touch by a loving parent.  Could we dare, just for a moment, imagine a life….well, without.

Our youngest four came in to our home over 5 years ago.  My husband and I were practically empty nesters when God called us to parent yet again.  It is funny to me that God surely “passed over” more qualified people until he came to us.  Older, menopausal (me). Impatient.  Our only true qualification and endearing quality?  Willingness.  We were willing to get messy and peel back the layers of needs from “not enough”. 

 What does “not enough” look like? It looks like a child saying “Mom” at the beginning of the sentence and then, just because you can, tacking it on the end of the sentence as well.  Saying it over and over as if the relief of NOT saying it for years is pouring out by the gallon.  Mom, Mama, Daddy, My mother, Mom, Dad, …over and over you hear it said, called out, attached to anything and everything. 

It is a never ending battle with food.  “Food will be here tomorrow."  “ We don’t have to eat it all right now."  “We will have breakfast now but you will get a snack at ten."  Followed by….whatever time the next meal will be.  That happens everyday….for months or even years.

In every area of life “not enough” displays it’s ugly head.  Every. Single. Day.
School?  Oh yeah….it shows up in grades, behavior, immaturity. 
Relationships?  You bet…it comes out in confusion, attachment problems, lying, people pleasing.

So, perhaps you are with me on this.  Have you had ENOUGH?  ENOUGH of seeing children not being safe.  ENOUGH of children who go without their basic needs being met.  ENOUGH of kids failing and floundering through their education for lack of concern around them. ENOUGH of kids fighting for survival. ENOUGH of children starving for love.  ENOUGH.  I have had ENOUGH.

Every wound healed.  Every child, a home.